Category Archives: Ethics

How to Network and Ethically Do Business in a Relationship Industry

Originally published Meetings Today blog

How to Network and Ethically Do Business in a Relationship Industry

My number one “strength” is “connectedness.” And though I dislike networking in the traditional sense (the kind that is done at big events with too much noise and no time for deeper conversation—check out this video podcast for more), connecting with others, and learning more about their ideas and opinions and experiences, matters greatly.

After all, I learned great networking skills from Susan RoAne, the “Mingling Maven,” years ago at an industry meeting and I still follow her work and the principles learned because she understands the value of it, and knows how to network, beyond the superficial.

Years ago, serving on the board and then as president of the MPI Potomac Chapter, I remember using the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) and other tools in a facilitated exercise to build a better board through our relationships. I confirmed that for me to work well with someone, I had to be connected in more than one way.

That is, I wanted to know who I was working with—and their specific interests—in order to be able to connect more than casually.

That has served me well in many years in the industry and business … until this summer. I recently was “taken in” during a critical negotiation when I thought someone really wanted to know me and have me know them. It turns out they didn’t. My involvement was merely a means to an end, and soon the honesty went straight out the window.

Some of what a client and I went through will form a backdrop for this upcoming Meetings Today webinar on Oct. 25 at 1 p.m. Eastern Time, which Kelly Bagnall, Esq., a meetings industry attorney on the hotel side, and I will co-present. You’ll want to tune in for specific examples.

What happened this summer caused me to reflect back on more positive outcomes resulting from strong industry relationships. I thought about a dinner during a PCMA meeting, who was there and why, and what was said. At this dinner and at others, outside the bustle of the larger meeting and official (and invited) events, friends could catch up with each other, make connections and talk in a more intimate setting, my preferred way of networking and building relationships.

At one dinner of 30, it was suggested that introductions include “how I’m connected to Joan.” It was fascinating to hear: the planners said they’d learned from me in a class or from my writing; the suppliers said they’d experienced a tough but fair negotiation.

In another instance where connectedness paid off, I was working for a client at whose organization there had been some “irregular activity” [I can’t call it criminal because it was never prosecuted]: planners, including those at the most senior level, set up a side company (to their existing employment), and in the name of that company, inserted a commissionable page into contracts after the contracts were signed by their employer.

The planners then went further and booked bogus meetings using the insertion and the electronic signature of the CEO. All this was uncovered in an audit, they were fired, and I was brought in to fix the damage. A connection with an industry attorney—lawyers and hotel lawyers are not our enemies!—who represented the hotel owners knew enough about me and my integrity to know that I wanted to make the situation right for the client and for the hotel owner and management companies. Without the existing relationship and a reputation for ethical behavior, openness in dealing with the situation, and the connection made, the results for the association might have been very costly.

We don’t have to be “best” or even good friends. It simply helps for us to know about the other to understand what makes us tick and how we operate. Pretending you want to get to know each other when you are, instead, manipulating a situation, is not sincere and in the end, doesn’t enrich the trust that should be built in a complex negotiation.

In the sidebar you’ll see that more than one person mentions the ethics of how to work in this industry. There are varying guidelines at each of the industry association’s sites and none are exactly alike. For those who are CMPs, the Events Industry Council offers its own set of guidelines. Honor your employer’s or client’s code of conduct and others.

It all seems simple and yet, due to the bottom line- and date-focused nature of the industry, we tend to not play fairly. Below are some suggestions about how to build and keep relationships based on my own personal experience. Over the years I’ve worked and built relationships with people who work in sales, convention services and law.

Those relationships, and others this summer after the unpleasant one, allowed me to find solutions to sticky situations in which my clients’ dollars were at stake—situations where I would not benefit directly. (I am paid by fees from clients vs. commissions. That’s relevant because in each case where a relationship paid dividends, my pockets were not further enriched because of the relationships and work).

Here are five guidelines that I think we can all follow to ethically advance our work and build better relationships.

1. Play fairly. Groups should send full RFPs detailing all that’s important (including any non-negotiable items). Suppliers should send proposals that answer all the questions asked in the RFP and others anticipated based on research. Establish realistic deadlines and determine how you both can meet them.

2. Work honestly. Tell the truth in all aspects of your work. Don’t rush through a negotiation just to meet a deadline that involves bonuses for one party especially if it results in an incomplete contract or doesn’t allow time to re-read the contract to correct inconsistencies (See Tammi Runzler’s comments in the Friday With Joan sidebar).

3. Be sincere. Don’t fake interest in the other person if it’s not there. Still be polite and listen to what they have to say. You may be surprised at what you find in common that will enhance the relationship, even if you don’t become best friends, or friends at all.

4. Operate ethically. Become better acquainted with your company’s ethics policy and that of your clients and customers. Planners, stop expecting supplier partners to treat you with a gift or provide personal perks. Suppliers stop offering perks to planners to get a contract signed. In the end, it only furthers the perception about and actions of our industry that draw negative attention and can result in job losses—mostly for planners.

Planners, take a supplier to lunch instead of being expected to being treated (I confess to thinking about the brilliant late Stan Freberg and his “Stan Freberg Presents the United States of America.” One excerpt can be heard here, followed by the full recording).

5. Keep friendships and business relationships separate. If you’re negotiating with someone who has become a friend because you got to know each other through industry activities or you found something in common while doing business together, remember to take off your “friend hat” and put on your “business hat” and be explicit about doing so. It keeps the relationship and the outcomes cleaner.

And now here are some final words to consider.

A friend and cancer patient, Karen Francis, wrote the words quoted below as I was considering the content of this blog post. I share it with her permission:

“As I think about the value of the ‘seasoned nurse’ … I am reminded of the many ‘seasoned bankers’ that groomed my career and contributed to the tremendous success … We all knew how … to satisfy the client’s needs at any cost, and how to beg for forgiveness instead of asking for permission in bending the rules. We were ‘client driven’ not ‘sales [driven]’ and we were all ‘old school,’ trained and developed within by each other’s career experiences.”

To help us become better—and more ethical—negotiators and connectors, I asked people who currently or have been in industry sales and those who help hire for their take on doing business. I think you’ll find their responses helpful, no matter if you’re new to the industry or an old dog learning new tricks.

See the Friday With Joan companion article for these responses.

And please add your tips in the comments. It is complicated, at times, when we form these friendships that may last (or not) after the “deal” is over. We are potentially going to do business together again. It is best to ensure an honest relationship from the start.

Click here to view additional content in the 08.04.17 Friday With Joan newsletter.

Follow Joan on Twitter: @joaneisenstodt

What Do You and Our Industry Stand For?

Originally Posted Meetings Today Blog

I have written about whether groups should consider boycotting or pulling meetings and other business from states where laws are passed that are in direct opposition to their work or positions on diversity and inclusion. This includes laws that could potentially discriminate against and/or harm those who attend their conventions.

Richard Yep, CEO of the American Counseling Association (ACA), was interviewed in this article included in the July 2016 edition of Friday With Joan and in ASAE’s Associations Now about what his association did, including talking with the governor of Tennessee to try to keep a bill from becoming law, to try to stay in Nashville for their annual meeting. The state passed a law that made it impossible for ACA to meet there.

The Texas Legislature is in the process of considering what has become known around the U.S. as a “bathroom bill.” This and other proposed bills that are considered anti-LGBTQ are causing colleagues, organizations and companies to look closely at their policies—primarily ones on diversity and inclusion, and bylaws and missions—to determine what they will do regarding booking business in states like North Carolina and Tennessee where such bills have been passed and signed into law.

In another publication, ASAE President and CEO John H. Graham IV spoke about the outlook for meetings in 2017 and shared his views on the importance of diversity and inclusion and tracking laws such as those passed and those proposed. In MPI’s Meeting Professional publication, U.S. Travel Association CEO Roger Dow shared a different view of potential actions by companies and organizations in a situation where a law that they do not agree with is passed. The article was first published on the Huffington Post blog.

Dow argues that “we’re all better off when travel is not weaponized through bans and boycotts, but instead used as a unifying force for building understanding.” He then gives examples of destinations or entire states (North Carolina, Indiana, Mississippi, etc.) that lost business due to passed legislation.

While I believe the issues raised by Dow are critical because fewer jobs or less well-paying jobs hurt individuals and communities, I believe as strongly that potential harm to communities—and to those who travel on business or come to cities for conventions and conferences—must be considered when determining to boycott a city, hotel company or other business/destination whose practices are not in sync with one’s personal beliefs or the beliefs representative of a specific organization.

This blog will be published on the day on which a new U.S. President is being inaugurated and you may read it after he is. It comes after a weekend when a sitting member of Congress, a civil rights leader and 30-year U.S. House of Representatives member, John Lewis (D-GA), spoke out against the legitimacy of the election of the new U.S. President.

After Mr. Lewis’s comments, Mr. Trump tweeted the following:

“Congressman John Lewis should spend more time on fixing and helping his district, which is in horrible shape and falling apart (not to…… mention crime infested) rather than falsely complaining about the election results. All talk, talk, talk – no action or results. Sad!”

[This message was written over two tweets].

If you are not familiar with John Lewis and his life of action that yielded results, you can read more from The Atlanta Journal-Constitution and on Biography.com. [It was reported by reliable sources that the incoming U.S. president was not familiar with John Lewis, which I found abhorrent. I share the views of Charles M. Blow, a writer for The New York Times]. I wish I had Mr. Lewis’ energy to do all he has done to move the world toward justice.

In the Jan. 2017 edition of Friday With Joan, which contains one of the many blog posts that I regularly write for Meetings Today, I wrote about the importance of meetings bringing people together.

Consider this a call to action for you to bring these topics to discussion in the comments area below and in your own organization and families:

  • What do you stand for?
  • In what instances will you speak out, individually or as a company, about the rights of others—whether it’s the right to use a restroom or the pay employees receive (including the rights and pay of hotel higher-ups or of hotels themselves versus line workers in hotels, for example); the rights and pay of women or the rights of immigrants on whom our industry is dependent?
  • How are you working to better the world and the conditions in which we all live?
  • Would you do what some Texas DMOs and PCMA (during PCMA’s Convening Leaders in Austin) did? [You are encouraged to read the comments, some are frightening and important to know]. And here’s more news on the Texas Welcomes All coalition.
  • Are you making your meetings truly sustainable and seeking vendors and venues that practice human sustainability as well as “greening” efforts that benefit our world?
  • If, as stated in Roger Dow’s article, a great percentage of planners do not believe boycotts are effective, what do you think will help keep discriminatory laws from being passed if it’s not the “business case” often used to justify diversity and inclusion? What will help raise wages for those who are underpaid? What will help laws like North Carolina’s HB2 to be rescinded and avoided elsewhere?

How much are you willing to say or do to create change and in what ways? At a joint Shabbat service on Friday night on Jan. 13, 2017, at the Sixth & I Synagogue in D.C.*, which I attended with a diverse group of industry and other friends, this quote, from Rabbi Hillel, was said: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am not for others, what am I? And if not now, when?

I ask you for our industry and the people we bring together and those who work in our industry, if not now, when? What do we stand for and for what will we stand?

*The Sixth & I Synagogue service I attended has been held every year since 2004, jointly with Turner Memorial AME Church, to honor Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., and Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel.

When the Political Becomes the Practical, Part II

Originally published Meetings Today

It’s tough to separate the political from the professional whether in last week’s Friday With Joan blog post on professional development, the linked Q&A with Sekeno Aldred, Charles Massey and Jean Riley, or in this previous blog post “When the Political Becomes The Practical.”

While many are many speaking out—including these legal opinions—I look to our industry for a voice against what Donald Trump has said about restricting Muslims from entering the United States for any reason including as tourists. Can you imagine being a Muslim who works for a Trump property?

Or can you imagine being invited to attend a meeting at a Trump property … especially if you are a Muslim or someone thinks you are? Will activities or discussions of those attending your meetings have to be reported if this new law goes through?

Will we or will we not be as inclusive as the policies of all our industry associations say? Even The Washington Business Journal is asking the question about boycotting Trump properties, services and products with, to me, surprising results.

Where are the voices in our industry speaking out against hate? Even if it means using the “business case” as has been done to promote multiculturalism and diversity and inclusiveness.

 

4 Ways to Express Thanks and Thanks-giving

Originally published Meetings Today

This week, I offer a professional and personal blog written for a variety of reasons, one of which is the U.S. Thanksgiving holiday (or this); another is because this week my family buried my uncle, my father’s (of blessed memory) only sibling.

The time with family allowed me to learn more about where we came from, when and why pogroms and the Holocaust, cast us out of many lands bringing us to the United States.

Another reason is because the Thanksgiving holiday as celebrated is—or can be—an act of hospitality in a time when the world is inhospitable to so many in so many places. Stay with me please and allow me some personal reflections on hospitality, Thanksgiving and thanks-giving.

What are children today taught about the U.S. Thanksgiving? What is discussed at home and in school or in home schooling, about the meaning of giving thanks as well as the holiday? (In grade school, I remember drawing photos of turkeys using a hand to outline a turkey. Do they still do that? Now, with greater awareness, what do they do to help children who don’t have all their fingers or two hands or the use of their hands?).

I wonder too, more this year than others of recent memory, if the meaning of being refugees—and acceptance and rejection by those who are native to a land in which a refugee finds her or himself—is discussed. Do families and groups of friends, gathered around a table, discuss the situation of refugees from wars and violence and thank each other for the gift of family and friendship? Are strangers welcomed to the neighborhood? To the table?

Or is this just another holiday on which retailers get ready to sell-sell-sell after a day of eating and football for many? And do we give to the many who have no table at which to eat or no food on which to put on a table?

(A friend posted this on Facebook. With humor, it is a perfect discussion-starter at your table … with humor. Also recommended, for the creative humor of the beginning of the United States, “Stan Freberg  Presents the United States of America,” portions of which you can listen to here.)

To this industry, into which I was destined to work and yet into which I fell because of Karen Mulhauser, who hired me into my first professional job in DC, I am grateful.

To Meetings Today and Stamats Communications [whose views may not always be reflected in what I write and speak and still allow me to do so.] To an industry to which I’ve devoted more than 45 years of my life, and in which I’ve been afforded and accepted opportunities to lead, teach, grow and help others grow, I am thankful.

Yet, I puzzle, especially on this holiday of hospitality and thanks-giving, at how those in charge of this industry—the staffs and Boards of Directors of the CIC member organizations—withhold hospitality by their lack of action, despite statements of diversity and inclusion, on issues such as inclusive housing, jobs, and other accommodations for people who are older, immigrants, LGBTQ, and/or have different abilities.

[See here the coalition http://houstonunites.org/about/, including the Houston DMO, United Airlines and a few other hospitality companies but no industry associations, who supported Houston’s badly defeated-by-misinformation-generated-fear Prop 1. The “crickets” from MPI (“Embrace and foster an inclusive climate of respect…”), PCMA (see number IX), ASAE (delve a bit deeper here), and others who say they are proponents of inclusion make me wonder to whom are we hospitable if we do not speak out and act on hospitality and inclusion.]

As you finish reading you may wonder why I’m posting something that some will perceive as political. Because it’s not. It’s about human rights and welcoming and accommodating, being hospitable, something about which I was taught the holiday of Thanksgiving—and our industry—was about. It is about how each of us determines to represent ourselves, our work, and our industry to others in what we do.

So to help you give thanks and show hospitality, you can:

  1. Say thank you. To the server or bus person who brings or takes away plates; to the setup staff who works an overnight shift to ensure your morning meeting is ready to go; to the person who holds the door open for you; to the many people who do small acts to ensure your safety and security. We can’t all be like young Zachary Becerra but we can emulate him.
  2. Express acceptance. Don’t repeat hate or rumor or support those who do. Become aware of another’s history and accept them for who they are. Help promote them in the workplace, your neighborhood, all places of your life.
  3. Reflect on times you were excluded from any group or neighborhood or club. Once you reflect, remember how it felt and then vow to include others. Which leads to…
  4. Take (inclusive) action. Don’t just say you support “diversity and inclusiveness,” live it and ask others to join you in doing so.

To each of you, my thanks, for reading and learning and taking action.

Is an Industry Veteran Also a Professional?

This article was originally published on Meeting Focus Blog.

Professional Dictionary Definition

For years, our industry has struggled to develop programming for the “veterans” of the industry. When I served on the Meetings & Exposition (“M&E”) Council of ASAE, and on education committees for MPI and PCMA, we struggled with defining veteran.

Did it mean the number of years in the industry? One or multiple roles in one organization? Increasingly more responsible roles in one organization? Working in different areas (planner, hotel sales, DMC, exhibits) of the industry? Is a veteran someone who has done the same meetings or sold the same property or service the same way over and over and over? (Read again the definition of veteran, linked above).

And how would an organization determine, even with the CMP, what parts of the body of knowledge were needed, and if the body of knowledge then was still relevant and would be in the next year? Is a veteran also a “professional?” And what defines a professional? If you read the words below about what a professional is, does “have the highest standards” mean the person’s ethics are beyond reproach? Or just in line with industry practices?

In a Linkedin group that is not directly related to our industry, there is a discussion of what “professional” means. One of the participants posted this, which I offer for your consideration and parsing (Reposted below).

_____________

WHAT IS A PROFESSIONAL?
By Brian Rigsby.

“One definition might be getting paid to do something. Another might be a commitment to performing at the highest level, to give your best at all times. Yet another may be exhibiting a courteous, conscientious, and generally businesslike manner in the workplace. While all of these are partially correct, there are many facets to being a true professional.

A professional has specialized skills and knowledge that required independent erudition and effort on their part to attain. They engage in a process of constant evaluation and improvement. A professional makes decisions based on their dedication to the craft and not the current circumstance. The characteristic that separates the professional from the dilettante is an uncompromising commitment to excellence – doing what is required to get the job done at its highest level, even when it is inconvenient. An amateur is capable of doing some things well under the right conditions, but a professional, as a matter of course, does it well regardless of the situation.

A professional is passionate, motivated and punctual. A professional respects the respectable, but admires the inspirational. A professional is a seeker of knowledge but also a teacher. A professional is disciplined, has the highest standards, and is engaged in the constant pursuit of unattainable perfection. A professional is restless and never satisfied, always evaluating and re-evaluating where they’ve come and finding ways to do what they are doing better now, today, moment to moment.”<<

Join me in trying to figure this out. It’s a bit philosophical perhaps or maybe not! Perhaps you’ve defined the words for yourself and within your own organization or about those you hire or with whom you contract. Please share your definitions and your thoughts. I really am puzzled.